


The Voice on The Radio

by JJ1564, TxDorA



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blow Jobs, Bottom Jensen, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, Kissing, M/M, Music, Radio, Schmoop, Top Jared, jared in scrubs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-04
Updated: 2017-12-04
Packaged: 2019-02-10 15:18:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12914625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJ1564/pseuds/JJ1564, https://archiveofourown.org/users/TxDorA/pseuds/TxDorA
Summary: Jared loves listening to Jack on his classic rock radio show, and dreams of meeting the guy with the sexy voice. He knows nothing about Jack, except that he needs to meet him. His housemates Matt and Rich tease him about his obsession, but help him reach a decision. He's going to go to the radio station - but will he meet Jack and will he be as sexy as his voice?





	1. You Shook Me All Night Long

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the SPN Reversebang on LJ, and inspired by TxDorA's lovely artwork. It's been a pleasure to work with her and the additional pieces she made are beautiful. Please go to her link...
> 
> https://tx-devilorangel.livejournal.com/4943.html
> 
> A HUGE thanks to my betas Somer and Milly-gal for all their help and support with this fic.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared is a little bit in love with DJ Jack's voice, and fantasizes about meeting him. Spurred on by his friends, he makes a decision to go to the radio station to meet him.

“Okay, night owls, here’s a request from Jared, and it’s a Led Zep classic - Kashmir.”

Jared smiled as Jack’s voice said his name. At last. He loved listening to Jack’s deep, husky voice and had imagined hearing him say his name for months. He’d phoned in several requests but despite being on at 2am, Jack’s radio show was popular. As the man himself said, it was the show for insomniacs, taxi drivers, night shift workers and students.  
Jared filled two of those categories – he was a medical student, so he often studied into the early hours, and he also worked in an old people’s home two nights a week helping the old folk go to the bathroom, changing their beds, doing the laundry, all the glamorous stuff.

But tonight, he was at home, studying. Well, he had been studying until he heard Jack’s voice. How could anyone concentrate when that whisky-honey voice spoke? Jared had his headphones in, so he didn’t disturb his housemates Matt and Rich. They were often awake late too – his headphones were also useful for to shutting out the sounds of their noisy love-making, as their bedroom was right next to his.

Jared lay back and let the sounds of Led Zep flow into his brain. He imagined Jack lying next to him as they listened to the track together, both exhausted from some noisy love-making of their own.

“Great choice, Jared. I think you’ll like the next one, too,” Jack said, making Jared sit up straight. Jared knew it was stupid to think there could be any connection; Jack didn’t know him, he was just another caller, but Jared couldn’t help the way his heart leapt when Jack said his name the second time. Then the bars of “Whole Lotta Love” began, and Jared took his already half-hard cock in his hand, stroking it gently at first but with increasing urgency until he came as the song ended.

“Fuck...” he murmured. “I gotta find you, Jack, gotta see you.”

He had a frequent daydream of going to the radio station and waiting for Jack to emerge. But he had no idea what the guy looked like. Jack was private; there were no photos of him on the radio’s website and no one knew his full name, he was just called Jack, sometimes Classic Jack as he played mainly classic rock. Perhaps he was kinda ugly, or old. Jared liked to think he wasn’t a shallow person, so it shouldn’t or wouldn’t matter what Jack looked like. Yet he also hoped Jack was tall and slim, with wide shoulders and green eyes...damn, he was fantasizing about Jensen-fucking-perfect-Ackles again. It had been a couple of years since the guy had disappeared from the public eye, yet Jared still remembered how beautiful he was, what an amazing voice he had, and the sexy way he had walked across the stage, like a big cat prowling gracefully through the jungle or across the plains.

Jared rubbed his eyes. His orgasm had drained the last of his caffeine-fueled energy, and Jack’s show was almost over, so he pushed his books onto the floor and collapsed back onto his bed, pulling his covers over him before falling asleep with Jack’s husky voice in his head – along with the image of Jensen’s sad green eyes.

 

The following week was a blur for Jared. His current placement was in a busy ER, so he was rushed off his feet all day, then had studying to do when he made his weary way home. The one thing keeping him going was hearing Jack on the radio Monday through to Thursday. He kinda wished Jack was on every day, but that was unreasonable. His late night/early morning slot was occupied by a guy who played indie music and Jared liked that too - just not as much as he liked classic rock - or Jack.

“What’s up with you, Padamopey?” Rich asked on the Friday night. They’d decided to order in a pizza and watch a movie as they were all home for a change.

“Just tired, long-ass week.” Jared yawned.

“Humph.” Matt stared at him. “Yeah, you look like shit, but it’s not that.”

“I got it! You’re pining for DJ Sexy Voice, aren’t you?” Rich grinned. “You gotta wait three whole days before he’s back on the radio.”

“Don’t be stupid.” Jared shrugged. “I just like listening to him, he plays great music.”

“Oh yeah, it’s real orgasmic stuff, Padahorny.” Rich winked.

“What the hell?” Jared could feel a blush spreading over his face. He had no idea they could hear him; he thought he’d kept quiet.

“Rich...” Matt started to warn him.

“Thin walls, dude,” Rich smirked, and Jared wanted to punch him.

Sometimes he wondered what on earth Matt was doing with the guy. Matt was ridiculously good-looking; he could easily be a model, whereas Rich had an... interesting face, and was ten years his senior. But he was funny, generous, charming and clever; and as a newly-qualified ER doc, he was an unofficial mentor to Matt and Jared. However, he could be a real dick sometimes, and never seemed to know when he’d overstepped the mark. Jared didn’t mind Rich using his surname to make silly jokes, but again, Rich never knew when to stop. Like right now.

“I guess it makes up for all the times I’m kept awake by you two,” Jared growled. “Thin walls, dude.”

“At least we’re with actual people, not our right hand and a voice on the radio,” Rich retorted, miming obscenely.

“Rich, enough.” Matt glared at his boyfriend.

“Nah, it’s okay, Matt.” Jared stood up and grabbed a slice of pizza. “I’ll leave you two ‘actual’ people to watch the movie, I got work to do.”

“Hey, don’t be like that, Padadonna, you know I’m just kidding with you,” Rich grinned.

“Fuck off, dickhead,” Jared retorted.

“C’mon Jared, please sit down, we hardly get to see you,” Matt implored.

Jared sighed and sat down. Matt was a sweet guy and he didn’t want to upset him.

“Sorry, Jared,” Rich muttered; the use of his first name made Jared realize Rich was truly sorry.

“It’s okay.” Jared bit into his pizza and sat back to enjoy Avengers Assemble. It was great house-sharing with fellow Marvel nerds.

After the movie and a few beers, Jared was relaxed enough to ask his friends a question.

“Um, guys, can I run something past you?”

“Sure,” Matt’s blues eyes focused on him.

“Go ahead,” Rich nodded.

“I’m...well, I really need to see what Jack looks like.”

“Holy fuck,” Rich laughed. “You got it bad, man.”

“Seriously?” Matt raised a perfect eyebrow. “What if he’s old, or bald, or looks like Trump?”

“First two don’t matter, I mean you’re with him,” Jared pointed at Rich.

“Hey, I’m older, not old. And I ain’t bald,” Rich protested.

“No offence, I just mean age and looks aren’t everything.”

“Now I’m offended,” Rich pouted theatrically.

“Aw, I love you, sugarplum,” Matt joked, fluttering his eyelashes at him. Then he turned back to Jared. “Okay, but Jack might be married, or straight, or with someone.”

“True,” Jared sighed.

“You haven’t really been with anyone since Gil.” Matt leaned forward. “Perhaps you should try dating...”

“You know I have been on some dates, Mattie. And I don’t wanna talk about Gil.” Jared sighed. “I’m gonna call it a night and...”

“No, you started this. You wanted our advice,” Rich interrupted him. “This guy’s been in your head for months now, and since he played your song, you’ve been either skipping around like a Disney princess or moping about the place.”

“I’ve not...”

“Hear me out. I say, go to the radio station, see what he looks like. Introduce yourself as a big fan, ask for an autograph,” Rich continued. “Then at least you’ll know what he looks like and if there’s any mutual attraction there.”

“And I’d know that from one meeting?” Jared smiled.

“We did,” Matt grinned.

“But you know you two are abnormal,” Jared teased. “You really think I should do this?”

“Yeah, we do,” they said in sync, and then both laughed along with Jared.

“Well, I guess I’ll go for it.” Jared smiled at them. “Thanks, guys.”


	2. Thunderstruck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared waits at the radio station and meets Jack - and his protective friend Gen. Jack invites Jared to a local coffee shop and as they get to know each other, Jared discovers that Jack is actually reclusive rock star, Jensen Ackles. Jared is a huge fan of Jensen's, and can hardly believe that Jack is really him.

 

It didn’t take much detective work on the internet for Jared to find the address of the radio station, but there was little information about Jack, which was weird. Any internet searches just returned to his radio show.

Jared dozed fully dressed on his bed until 3.30 am then drove down to the radio station, arriving at 4am. He guessed that Jack wouldn’t be out straight away, so he parked opposite and waited, suddenly feeling like a stalker, but knowing he had to see Jack, perhaps even introduce himself.

The doors of the building remained firmly shut, and Jared was pleased he’d brought a flask of coffee and some cookies with him. At least it was getting lighter now, nearing dawn. His heart leapt when the door opened at 5am, but it was a petite young woman, with long dark hair. She glanced over at Jared, then a scowl appeared on her pretty face. She marched across to his car and rapped on the window.

Jared lowered the window, giving her his best ‘I’m not a stalker’ smile. “How can I help you?”

“Are you a reporter?” She demanded.

“A reporter?” Jared frowned in confusion. “Um, no, I’m a medical student.”

She didn’t look convinced. “Then why are you parked here?”

“I’m...um...I...” Jared couldn’t think of a good reason for being there.

“I think you should go.” She scowled again.

“It’s a free country, I can park where I like,” Jared retorted.

“I know you’re here to try to see Jack.” She glared at him.

“Okay, I’m busted.” Jared saw no point in lying. “Look, I really love his show, and I just...”

“What? Wanted to see him, talk to him?” She demanded.

“Well, yeah...”

“Gen, are you okay?” A guy called out and Jared’s heart flip-flopped again as he recognized the voice.

“It’s alright Jack, just getting rid of a stalker.”

Jack laughed, and Jared tried to peer around his protective friend, Gen, to see him.

“Hey, buddy, eyes on me,” she growled.

“I’m Jared. Jack played a song for me last week and...”

“And what?” Gen asked, and Jared thought she was freaking scary for such a small person.

“Jared. Kashmir.” Jack said, now standing next to Gen. He was tall and slim, with wide shoulders, but he was wearing a baseball cap and dark glasses, so all Jared could see was his fine, straight nose, designer stubble and full, pink, pretty lips.

“Yeah, look, I’m sorry, I’m not a stalker or anything, I just love your show and your voice and...” Jared could feel the blush grow on his cheeks.

“Well, I won’t call the cops, but I will warn you not to park up to ogle me again,” Jack answered, smiling at him.

“I’m sorry...” Jared almost-wailed.

“You’re forgiven.” Jack grinned. “Now, give me your cell number in case I need to call you to discuss Led Zep’s finest work some time.”

“What? Really?” Jared’s eyes almost popped out of his head.

“Je...Jack, is this a good idea?” Gen asked.

“Yeah, it’s not like I’m giving him my number, Gen,” Jack replied.

Jared rattled off his cell number as Jensen punched it into his own.

“See you around, but not here, okay?” Jack gave him another smile; Jared thought he was beautiful, even if he couldn’t see the color of his eyes or his hair.

Jared nodded as Jack turned away, putting his arm around Gen. Jared felt an irrational stab of jealousy; Gen was beautiful and feisty. Worse still, they looked so good together. Jared sighed as he drove away, then grinned as he realized he had actually met Jack, he had spoken to him and Jack had asked for his phone number – it was all wonderfully unbelievable.

 

That night Jack dedicated “Houses of the Holy” to his “new stalker, the guy with amazing eyes and a real cute blush.” Jared was beside himself with happiness, as not only did this fuel his hope that Jack was gay but also that Jack was attracted to him.

It was several days before Jared received a text from an unknown number. “Hey there stalker, wanna meet up for a coffee?” Jared’s fingers shook as he texted his reply and they arranged a day and time to meet.

Jared had never felt so nervous about going on a date before – not that this was a date, just a coffee. With a gorgeous guy who’s voice he was already in love with.

“For fuck’s sake, Padaclotheshorse, you looked fine in the blue shirt.” Rich rolled his eyes.

“It was too formal. He wants to go for casual,” Matt informed him.

“Since when did you give a fuck about clothes?” Rich laughed. “An’ you don’t need to, you’d look good in a sack. Even better out of one...”

“You two really aren’t helping,” Jared sighed. He went back to his bedroom and put on the first outfit he’d tried on. Black jeans and his favorite soft grey t-shirt that clung to all the right places, as Matt had put it. He put a dark grey plaid shirt over it and sighed as he looked in the mirror. “Crap. Too dark.” He looked at his watch and sighed again. “Too late to change it again, get a grip and get going!” He told his reflection.

He was meeting Jack at 11am, at a coffee shop not far from the radio station. His stomach rumbled when he entered; there was an alluring smell of bacon in the air, combined with the scent of cinnamon and fresh coffee. He couldn’t see Jack but as he walked up to the counter to order a coffee, Jack spotted him and waved him over. He was sitting in a booth tucked away at the back of the café, baseball cap and shades still in place. Jared sure hoped he’d remove them at some point.

“Hey, stalker,” Jack greeted him warmly, holding out his hand to shake Jared’s.

“Hey, Jack,” Jared grinned back, loving the feel of Jack’s hand in his and hating that it was for a just a brief moment.

“Thanks for coming,” Jack picked up a coffee pot. “Coffee?”

“Um, yeah, sure, please.” Jared tried to will his heart from beating too fast, and to will his brain to get in gear and to say more than ‘um, sure and yeah’.

“There’s milk or cream...” Jack laughed. “I dunno why I’m telling you that, as you can see it; I think I’m a bit nervous.”

“You’re nervous?” Jared asked in astonishment. “Why on earth are you nervous?”

“Well, I haven’t done this...” Jack waved his hand back and forth to indicate their proximity, “for a long time. I tend to only go out and about with my little group of friends.”

“Same here,” Jared peered around cautiously. “Speaking of friends, your scary guard dog isn’t here, is she?”

Jack chuckled. “If you mean Genevieve, she’s not here, you’re safe.”

“Phew. I get the feeling she’s small but lethal.”

“You’d be right,” Jack smiled again and sat back to look at Jared. “I’m pleased you came along, Jared-the-stalker.”

A waitress appeared by Jack’s elbow, asking what she could get them. Jack ordered a slice of apple pie with ice cream and Jared ordered a cinnamon bun. He would have liked something more – the bacon aroma was heavenly – but as Jack had ordered pie, he thought he should go with something snacky and sweet, too.

“So, I know you’re a medical student, and a fan of my show and Led Zep, of course.” Jack smiled. “But I’d like to know more about you. So I can trust you and stop calling you stalker.”

Jared huffed out a laugh. “There’s not much more to tell. My name’s Jared Tristan Padalecki, I’m twenty-two, and I’m originally from San Antonio, moved here to start med school. I have an older brother and younger sister; dad’s a lawyer and mom’s a teacher. I lost my virginity to my first boyfriend, Todd Reynolds, at his seventeenth birthday party, in his parent’s summerhouse.”

Jared could feel himself blushing, but he felt it was good to get it ‘out there’.

“And are you still with Todd?” Jack asked. Jared was pretty sure he was raising an eyebrow but it was hard to tell, and he wished again that Jack would lose the shades.

“Nah, he had a tiny...” Jared saw the waitress approach. “...summerhouse.”

Jack spat out his coffee as he barked out a laugh. They managed to thank the waitress before they burst out laughing again.

Jack took off his sunglasses to wipe his eyes. “Oh boy, Jared, I’ve heard them called all kinds of things but never a summerhouse!”

Jared’s jaw literally dropped open. Jack’s eyes were bright emerald green. Jack was Jensen Ackles. Holy fuck, Jack was Jensen-fucking-Ackles.

“Shit,” Jack smiled sheepishly at Jared’s reaction, “I guess you know who I am, then?”

“Holy fuck, you’re...” Jared somehow had enough sense to lower his voice. “You’re Jensen Ackles.”

“Yep, that’s me.” Jensen blushed and rubbed his eyes. “I was going to introduce myself properly. I’m sorry to spring it on you. Were you a fan or do you just like watching those ‘when celebrities loose it’ shows?”

“I was...I am a fan.” Jared knew he was staring and looked down at his cinnamon bun. He really wasn’t hungry any longer. “I thought you looked a bit like him...like you, I mean, and sounded like him...you...but I never expected...”

“Take a deep breath, Jared,” Jensen smiled. “I’m just a guy.”

“Pfahwaha,” Jared said, or something like that.

“Honestly,” Jensen looked intently at him. “I’m Jensen Ross Ackles, from Richardson, disc jockey and ex-lead singer of a rock band. I lost my virginity to Dave Smithson on my eighteenth birthday - his summerhouse was adequate, but he had real bad breath.”

Jared smiled, feeling some of his tension drain away. “It’s so hard to find someone who’s summerhouse is perfect.”

Jensen laughed again, and Jared wanted to hear that sound every day for the rest of his life. He knew about Jensen, of course he did. And he’d noticed that Jensen hadn’t mentioned his family, which was understandable.

They chatted about music, movies and food. Jack – no, Jensen – was great company and so easy to talk to. Jared’s face fell when Jensen looked at his watch and said he had to go to a meeting at the station.

“Jared, don’t look so sad. I’d love to see you again,” Jensen said.

“You would?” Jared wanted to do a cartwheel across the room and was sure if there’d been enough space, he would have done one. He had to be content with the cartwheels in his heart.

“Yep, I don’t do this...haven’t done this for a while...um...” Jensen was blushing now and it was adorable.

“What about trying out that new Mexican restaurant downtown?” Jared suggested.

“Great, I love Mexican food,” Jensen smiled.

They arranged to meet on Saturday night. Jared’s heart cartwheeled again as he said goodbye to Jensen, and then all the way home.


	3. Is This Love?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jensen can't stop thinking about Jared, and when they meet up for their first date it goes really well. Until Jensen opens up to Jared about his past - Jared's a good listener - and ends up running off to the bathroom in tears.

 

Jensen woke up with a smile on his face for the first time in months, which wasn’t surprising as the past three years had been the worst in his life. It had started when Misha broke his heart and betrayed him. Then his mom had gotten sick and he hadn’t been there when she died. His family had turned their backs on him, although he still saw his dad once or twice a year. He had split up his band and lost a good friend. His career and reputation were in tatters.

He knew he was lucky to still have his best friends, Jason and Steve, and it was thanks to Jason’s wife Genevieve that he had a new career as a night time disc jockey. She had become a good friend too, as well as being his producer.

He felt like he had a second chance, and while he missed performing, he was still playing music and writing new songs at home. His love life was non-existent, as he couldn’t bring himself to trust anyone after what Misha had done to him.

But Jared was...beautiful. His eyes shone when he laughed, he had an adorable mole on his cheek, and delicious dimples. His chestnut hair was shiny and almost touched his shoulders - Jensen had always loved guys with long hair, although he liked to keep his own short. He also liked guys wearing eyeliner and wondered what Jared would look like wearing it - it would make his amazing eyes look stunning.

“Earth to Ackles,” Steve laughed, snapping his fingers in front of Jensen. He was staying over at Jensen’s for a couple of days while his house was being decorated.  


“Sorry, daydreaming,” Jensen smiled.

“About someone tall, dark and handsome?”

“Yeah...I just...” Jensen shrugged. There was no point lying to Steve; he knew him too well. They’d been friends since high school. “I guess I’m a little anxious about it all. You know I haven’t been on any dates since Misha.”

“I’m surprised you ain’t worn your right wrist out, to be honest. Men ain’t meant to be celibate.”

“I’m hardly a monk, and that’s very sexist.”

“Okay, humans ain’t meant to be celibate, Mister PC,” Steve grinned. “And you may as well be a monk, it’s about time you got some action.”

“It’s not just about sex, you horn dog.” Jensen rolled his eyes. “I really like him, he’s smart, funny and sweet.”

“Bleurgh. I only want to hear the dirty stuff, Ackles. Save the cutesy stuff for Gen.”

“You’ll be lucky if I ever talk to you about him again,” Jensen grumbled.  


“Aw, don’t be a pouter, ya know I love ya!”

“It’s just lucky for you that you make a good breakfast,” Jensen retorted before biting into a pancake so light and fluffy it could be made of cloud. Huh. Where had that piece of whimsy come from? He smiled, thinking that if this was a Disney movie, right now he’d be singing with some woodland creatures while little blue birds whistled merrily as they flew around his head, not sharing breakfast with a grumpy guitarist.  


“You got that dopey look on your face again,” Steve remarked.

“So, sue me for being happy,” Jensen grinned.

“It’s good to see you so happy, Ackles. Just...be careful. You don’t know much about the kid, and you met him because he was stalking you.”

“He was hardly stalking me, dude, he didn’t even know who I was.”

“I just don’t want you to be hurt.”

“Aw, Stevie-baby, you do love me!”

“This is getting’ far too chick-flick, let’s talk about sport.”

“I hate sport.”

“Good point.” Steve sighed, “Okay, tell me all about him.”

Jensen told Steve all he’d learned about Jared, and the first impressions he had formed about him. The main ones being that he wanted to see him again, and that he wanted to make him laugh, just to see his dimples flash and his eyes sparkle. Steve had rolled his eyes and said, “Damn, Ackles, you’re falling fast.”

 

By Friday, Jensen had already checked out the Mexican restaurant to see how fancy it was – should he wear a suit, or would it be smart-casual? He was pleased to see it had a very laid-back vibe, with people going in wearing everything from jeans and t-shirts to suits and classy dresses.

He decided to wear plain black trousers and his deep red shirt, going for the smart--casual look he favored. He showered, shaved and fussed over his hair until he was almost satisfied with it. Damn, he was nervous; he didn’t want to do anything to ruin this.

They met outside the restaurant; Jared looked great, in a tight black v-neck tee shirt that showed off his muscles perfectly, and dark grey jeans. He looked as nervous as Jensen, but they both smiled and hugged each other briefly. As soon as they sat down, their nerves disappeared as they chatted about their day, Jared making Jensen laugh with tales of his patients and co-workers. Over the meal they talked about books and movies, finding they had a lot in common and a mutual love of Dory from Finding Nemo. They laughed at the difference in their choice of favorite movie – Jared’s being It’s a Wonderful Life and Jensen’s Gladiator.

Jensen hadn’t felt so relaxed in a long time - he was usually reserved around people, especially those he didn’t know. And it wasn’t from drinking alcohol, as he rarely touched the stuff nowadays. It was Jared - he made him laugh, he made him feel like he was special and interesting, and he made him feel listened to. So much so that he let down his usual defensive guard and opened up to Jared.

“Jeez, I haven’t laughed so much since...I don’t remember.” Jensen sighed, wiping his eyes.

“I’m sorry you’ve had such a rough time,” Jared said, his eyes showing his concern.

“Yeah, it’s been tough, you know most of what happened. The whole freakin world does.” Jensen took a big swig of water, wishing it was something stronger. “But it’s not just that. I’m kinda good at pushing people away. My family, my friends... sorry, didn’t mean to get heavy.”

“It’s okay, Jensen, I want to get to know you,” Jared replied. “And I’m sorry that you don’t see your family.”

“I see my dad, on my birthday and around Thanksgiving, sometimes we’ll go to a ball game. I’m not a fan, but he is, and it gives us a chance to meet up, while avoiding the need to talk to each other.”

“Why do you need to avoid talking to him?”

“For starters, he’s a Baptist and doesn’t agree with my ‘sinful desires’, so we’ve never really got along, such a cliché.” Jensen rolled his eyes. “And I think he resents me for not being there when my mom died.”

“Shit, that is heavy. Do you want to talk about it?”

“It feels kinda good to talk about it, actually.” Jensen managed a small smile. “You’re a good listener, Jared Padaleski.”

“Padalecki,” Jared smiled. Jensen thought it was worth pretending to get his surname wrong to see that smile.

“Padalecki,” Jensen repeated, loving the way it sounded. Would they be Ackles-Padalecki or Padalecki-Ackles? Damn, those Disney blue birds were whistling again. This was only their second date, for God’s sake!

“Jensen? You okay?” Jared reached over and stroked his hand. It felt intimate and special, that small touch.

“Yeah, sorry. Just don’t really know where to begin.”

“Then start by telling me about your family.”

“I have an older brother, David, and a younger sister, Mason. You’d like them – Dave is a surgeon and Mason’s a teacher.” Jensen sighed. “When mom became ill, I paid for the best care for her, the best cancer specialists, the best nursing home. But some cancers just can’t be beat, no matter what you do, or how much money you throw at them. Mom was sick for nine months before she died, and in all that time I visited her twice.” Jensen felt his eyes fill up with tears and wiped them away, smiling ruefully at Jared.

“It’s okay, Jensen, please carry on, if you want to,” Jared coaxed, holding his hand now.

Jensen glanced around the restaurant, feeling self-conscious. It had emptied out as the night wore on, and now there were just a few people left. A rowdy crowd of guys and a few couples scattered around, but no one was near them or paying them any attention.

“I Skyped her every week, so we could chat, and I watched as she got get thinner and paler, but I never thought...” He wiped his eyes again. “I thought we had more time, I thought the treatment would work. The last thing she said to me was that it was lovely seeing me and talking to me, but what she really needed was a hug. So, I tried to cut short the tour to go home, but we were in Europe, and it wasn’t easy to get back. Fuck. It wasn’t easy, but I should have done it. I should’ve told Mark that some things were more fucking important than money.” Jensen paused. “Fuck, sorry, Jared.”

“You don’t need to apologize, I’m used to the occasional swear word,” Jared grinned. “Who’s Mark?”

“Mark Sheppard, my ex manager. I’ll stop whining soon, nearly there, I promise.” Jensen took a deep breath. “So, my sister phoned to tell me mom was failing, that I needed to get home, that mom wanted me. And I put my band’s Euro-fucking-pean tour first. So, my brother and sister hate me, and never want to see me again. My dad tells me about them – Dave has two kids now that I haven’t seen and Mason’s an elementary school teacher, engaged to a man I’ve never met.”

“Fuck, Jensen, that’s awful.”

“Yeah, I... I was a selfish pig.”

“No, I don’t mean what you did, I mean how your family has treated you.”

“What?” Jensen blinked in surprise. “They have every reason to hate me.”

“I didn’t know your mom, but I’m sure she wouldn’t want this for you, or for them. You say they hate you, but it can’t be as much as you hate yourself.”

“Shit...I can’t...” Jensen’s eyes filled with tears and he stood up. “I gotta...” he pointed towards the bathroom, heading towards it as he wiped his eyes.

In the privacy of the toilet stall, he let his tears fall for a moment. Jared was right, of course he was, it was no secret that he hated himself. So why was he crying? Jared seemed to understand him, although they hardly knew each other. He wiped his eyes, trying to pull himself together, but he couldn’t stop his tears. Shit, what the hell would Jared think of him? He knew Jared had seen the video of the moment he fell apart. On stage. In front of thousands of fans. And it was televised live.

He had felt like Maximus that night, thrown into the arena to bleed out for his adoring fans. After the first song, the noise of the cheering taunted him, mocked him, made him hate the thing he loved doing more than anything else. He had looked around, barely able to see the fans due to the bright lights. Jason had asked him if he was okay, and he shook his head. The crowd started to get restless as he stood there like a deer in the fucking headlights. A slow hand clap started, and a few people jeered.

“Sorry, I just...” He’d said. “My mom died yesterday. I wasn’t there. I couldn’t go to see her, although I knew she was dying. My manager told me this was more important. He said there was nothing I could do for her, that as soon as this tour finished, I’d be going home anyway. I shouldn’t have listened to him.”

The crowd was silent, waiting to hear what he said next. Then someone shouted, “I paid to hear you sing, not talk!”

“Yeah, that’s what it’s all about, isn’t it? Fucking money! If I’d canceled these gigs, it would’ve cost everyone a lot of fucking money.” Jensen had started to cry, his tears recorded by a thousand cell phones. “And if I’d gone home to be with my dying mother, it would have been so fucking inconvenient for everyone. So, I had to be here, to entertain you.” He glared at the audience, then quoted Maximus. “Are you not entertained?”

“C’mon, Jensen, let’s get off the stage,” Jason had whispered, placing his arm gently around Jensen’s shoulders.

“Ladies and gents, I think Jensen needs a little break...” Steve had announced.

“Fuck you!” Jensen had snarled, pushing Jason away. “Fuck all of you! I’m done, I’m finished with it all.”

Jensen threw a punch at Steve when he tried to grab him, then took his guitar off and threw it on the floor, shocked when he realized he’d broken the neck. He fell to his knees, cradling the guitar, rocking backwards and forwards; it looked so much like the first guitar his mom had saved up to buy him. Strong hands had lifted him up and half-carried him off the stage.

All he remembered once he’d been hauled off stage was that Jason had punched Mark in the face, screaming “What the hell did you give him?”

Mark had given him a handful of pills, told him they would lift his mood and get him through the gig, and Jensen had just swallowed them all down, followed by half a bottle of tequila. Jensen never touched drugs, and alcohol had always been his preferred means to relax and unwind, to get through the demands of touring and performing.

“Jensen, hey, buddy, are you okay?” Jared’s voice called out, breaking his reverie.

“Yeah, sure, sorry,” Jensen rubbed his eyes. “Be right out.”

“Okay,” Jared replied.

Jensen waited a minute before opening the door, hoping Jared would go back to their table and give him time to wash his face. But when he opened the door, Jared was right there and simply held out his long arms. Jensen stepped forward and let them wrap around him. He felt safe in Jared’s strong arms, safe and loved. Holy shit, was this love? Could it be love so quickly?

“It’s okay, Jensen, I got you,” Jared whispered, “you never need to hide your feelings from me.”

“I’m a fucking mess,” Jensen sobbed, “such a big fucking mess.”

“You’re beautiful, Jensen,” Jared released him to look at him. Jensen tried to look down, ashamed of his red, tear-streaked face. “Please, look at me,” Jared coaxed.  
Jensen lifted his eyes and saw Jared’s multi-colored ones looking back, so full of compassion, kindness, and something more...

“You’re beautiful, too,” he managed to say, before Jared leaned down and gently kissed away the tears that had run down his cheeks, then kissed his lips. Jared’s lips touching his made his body come alive, tingling right down to his toes. He never wanted Jared to stop, but knew they weren’t in the most romantic of places for a first kiss. Jensen sighed as Jared pulled away.

“Gonna have some lime with that salt next time,” Jared grinned.

“Next time?” Jensen asked, hopefully.

“Oh yes, there’s going to be a next time. Lots of them.”

“Jared, can we get out of here?” Jensen smiled. “I don’t just mean the john, I mean the restaurant.”

“Sure,” Jared laughed, adding with a wink, “your place or mine?”

Jensen’s heart flip-flopped. “Mine’s closer...”

“Good, ‘cause my flat mates are dicks.”

They paid the bill, then left the restaurant hand in hand. It felt so natural, so right to have Jared’s warm hand entwined with his. Jensen hoped this was love.


	4. Whole Lotta Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared goes back to Jensen's house with him, and gets to know the troubled, complicated and surprisingly shy ex-rock star better. The night doesn't go as Jared imagined, but he's happy with that.

 

Jared followed Jensen into his surprisingly modest house. Jared had expected a mansion with a grand piano and a guitar-shaped swimming pool. Actually, that’s what he would have expected, before he met Jensen. The ranch-style house on the lakeside suited Jensen perfectly. The living room was simple but warm, with two large cream sofas brightened by colorful scatter pillows. There was a whole wall of shelving, containing CDs, books and vinyl albums, and in one corner there were three guitars on stands. A sliding window opened out onto a terrace, lit by solar lights.

“You have a beautiful home, Jensen,” Jared said as he looked around.

“Thanks, I kinda like it,” Jensen replied, blushing. “Would you like a drink?”

“Yeah, thanks.” Jared nodded.

“Come through to the kitchen.” Jensen led him through to a large kitchen-diner, with a big wooden table and four chairs in the center.

“How long have you lived here?” Jared asked.

“Just over two years. I had to sell the place I shared with Misha.” A flicker of pain crossed Jensen’s beautiful face and Jared wanted to kiss it away. “I rented for a while, til I found this place. It was a little run-down, so it’s been a project, but I think I’m there now.”

“It suits you. Warm, interesting and beautiful.”

Jensen blushed again. For an ex rock star, he was adorably shy. “It suits me better than my old place. It was ridiculously large and so cliché – lots of big white rooms and a huge pool...”

“Guitar-shaped?”

Jensen laughed. “No, I do have some taste!”

“I’m pleased to hear that.” Jared put his drink on the counter and moved closer to Jensen. He could feel the heat from his body, smell his aftershave and shampoo, see the blush deepening on his cheeks and the way his long eyelashes fluttered as he looked up at him. And yeah, it was hot that Jensen had to look up at him. “And I think we need to kiss right here, right now.”

“I agree,” Jensen whispered.

Jared leaned down slightly to kiss Jensen, moving his body closer so that their hips were touching. It was heaven, being this close, deepening the kiss, loving how their bodies seemed to fit together, feeling Jensen’s hard dick through his jeans...

Suddenly Jensen pushed Jared away, his eyes wide in what almost looked like panic. “Sorry, I... I can’t...”

“It’s okay, Jensen, we can take it slow.”

“Really?” Jensen looked relieved, “I mean...I want you...I want this, but...”

“It’s been a while.” Jared smiled.

“Yeah,” Jensen laughed shakily. “Shall we go sit...perhaps outside, it’s a warm night.”

“That would be great.” Jared picked up his beer and followed Jensen out to the terrace. There were several comfortable recliner chairs and another large wooden table, plus some potted plants.

They sat on the recliner chairs, and Jensen sighed. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?” Jared asked. “I didn’t expect us to jump straight into bed; we hardly know each other.”

“I kinda did...” Jensen smiled. “I still do, but I think I need to take it a bit slower.”

Jared nodded. “It’s been a while for me, too, Jensen. Not years, but several months. His name’s Gil and he’s a med student. I thought he was the one, you know, hearts and flowers, the little fat cherub. But he cheated on me.”

“I’m sorry, Jared.” Jensen leaned closer, his green eyes bright in the lamp light. “He was a fool.”

“It’s weird, but I’m okay about it. I wasn’t as upset about it as I should’ve been, if that makes sense.” Jared smiled, thinking he was glad right now that Gil had cheated. “I was angry that he lied to me, but once we parted, I wasn’t heartbroken.”

“Perhaps he wasn’t the one, after all,” Jensen said, and Jared’s heart leapt at the implication. Jared knew it was too soon, but he wanted to be with Jensen, to kiss away his tears, to make him blush, to make him smile. And to think Jensen may be feeling the same way was beyond wonderful.

“He wasn’t,” Jared replied. “I know that now.”

“Fuck...” Jensen muttered and Jared worried that he’d said the wrong thing. “Jared...I... this...” he waved his hand at the space between them.

“Have I said something wrong?” Jared asked, worried.

“No...no, you’re so fucking perfect, I can’t believe you’re here with me, that you want this, you want me.”

“C’mere,” Jared patted his lap. “I want you, and I want you closer.”

Jensen got up and sat on his lap, chuckling. “We’re gonna break the chair.”

“Do you care?”

“Not even a little bit,” Jensen grinned.

They kissed and explored each other’s bodies; Jared loved how Jensen seemed a little bit obsessed with his hair by the way he was running his hands through it. The chair creaked but didn’t break, and by the time Jensen climbed off him, they were both disheveled and smiling happily.

“Wow,” Jensen sighed as he flopped into the chair next to Jared.

“Wow,” Jared agreed.

“Jared,” Jensen paused. “Jared, would you stay the night?”

“Sure,” Jared grinned.

“I’d love to fall asleep in your arms,” Jensen whispered, reaching out to stroke his face, “and wake up with you.”

“I’d love that, too.” Jared caught Jensen’s hand and kissed his fingers.

Jared texted Matt to let him know he wouldn’t be home that night. Matt texted back “Hallelujah!”

 

Jensen’s bedroom was like the living room, it was large with plain walls decorated with some artwork, and four guitars were hanging along one wall. A large wooden framed bed and a matching chest of drawers and bedside table were the only items of furniture. A shower room led from the bedroom, and Jensen excused himself to brush his teeth.  
Jared looked out of the window, at the beauty of the moonlight on the lake, and knew he could be very happy living here; he’d be happy anywhere with Jensen.

Jensen appeared dressed in just his boxers and Jared couldn’t help but admire Jensen’s body – and he couldn’t help the way his dick responded.

“Do you want to use the shower room?” Jensen asked. “There’s a spare toothbrush.”

“Oh, yeah, thanks,” Jared replied, although brushing his teeth was the last thing on his mind.

When Jared came back into the bedroom, Jensen was in bed with a sheet pulled up almost to his chin. Jared wanted to laugh – with his huge green eyes and pouty lips, he looked like a Victorian maiden on her wedding night. Jensen’s eyes roamed over Jared’s body and his grip on the sheet tightened.

“You’re beautiful,” he whispered, his eyes skittering across Jared’s body and down to his boxers, which were doing a very bad job at hiding his already half-hard dick.

“You too, Jensen.” Jared hesitated before getting on the bed. “You okay about this?”

“Yeah,” Jensen squeaked, then coughed, “I mean, yes, sure. Of course.” He forced a smile on his face and inched the sheet back enough for Jared to climb under it.  


Jared sat next to Jensen, unsure whether to touch him. Jensen was giving off waves of unease.

“Can I hold you?” Jared asked, opening his arms. Jensen nodded and moved over to lean against Jared’s chest. Jared wrapped his arms around Jensen and kissed his temple.

“Thanks, this feels...nice. Warm. Safe.” Jensen sighed.

“I love having you in my arms, it feels right,” Jared replied. “I know it’s early days, Jensen, and I don’t wanna rush this.”

“I feel the same, but right now I want to kiss you.” Jensen leaned back so they could kiss, with Jared supporting his neck. Kissing led to touching, which led to Jared wanting more, and assuming Jensen did, too. He rolled them over, so Jensen was beneath him and ran his hands down Jensen’s body, before releasing Jensen’s half-hard dick from his black silk boxers.

Jensen groaned, his eyes wide and his mouth open. He looked so beautiful. “Jared, I...”

“It’s okay, Jensen, I know it’s been a while.” Jared pushed his own boxers down and his dick sprang up towards his stomach, he was rock hard. “We’ll take it slow...”

“No,” Jensen gasped, moving across the bed, away from Jared and pulling the sheet back over his body. “I can’t...I don’t...I’m sorry.” His breathing was too fast and shallow. He was heading for a panic attack.

“Hey, you don’t need to apologize,” Jared reassured him, as he tucked his hard dick back into his boxers, feeling a little foolish now, but also concerned for Jensen. “Take some deep breaths. In, out, in, out. It’s all fine. You’re okay.”

Jensen’s breathing returned to normal and he gave a shaky laugh. “Thanks, I’m really sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, you’ve done nothing wrong. Do you want me to go?”

“No, no, please stay. I just wanted...I just wanted you to hold me.” Jensen looked like he was about to cry. “I’m sorry I gave you the wrong signals. I think I did want more, but then I saw...fuck. I’m not making much sense. I’ll understand if you want to go.”

“I don’t want to go. I’ll be happy to fall asleep with you in my arms.” Jared stood up. “Just let me...um...get rid of this.”

Jensen’s eyes flickered down to Jared’s dick and he nodded.

Jared stood in Jensen’s shower room and jerked off; it didn’t take long with the image of Jensen lying beneath him still so fresh in his mind. He hoped Jensen wouldn’t freak out next time they spent the night together. Jeez, he really hoped there’d be a next time.

Once he was back in the bed with Jensen in his arms, he felt happier. Jensen sighed and rested his head against Jared’s chest.

“I’m gonna say it one more time, because I mean it. I’m sorry, Jared, I didn’t mean to freak out.”

“It’s okay.” Jared kissed the top of Jensen’s head. “In fact, it’s actually quite flattering.”

“What do you mean?” Jensen asked, perplexed.

“Well, you took one look at my large summerhouse and freaked out.” Jared kept a straight face and hoped his attempt at humor wouldn’t fall flat.

Thankfully, Jensen laughed. “Hey, it’s pretty impressive, Padaleski, but don’t go getting big-headed.”

“I’ll try not to, Jason,” Jared winked and pulled Jensen closer.

“Goodnight, Jared. I’m pleased you stayed,” Jensen whispered, turning to kiss him briefly.

“Goodnight, Jensen. I’m pleased I stayed, too.”


	5. Feel Like Making Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next morning, Jensen tells Jared more about his relationship with Misha. The next night, following a bad shift, Jared listens to Jensen's show and he dedicates two songs to Jared. The following day, Jared has a surprise at the hospital.

 

Jared woke up to the smell of fresh coffee, pulled on his t-shirt and wandered through to the kitchen. Jensen was fixing up a tray with coffee, toast and peanut butter.

“Morning,” Jared smiled. “Aw, were you gonna bring me breakfast in bed?”

“Morning,” Jensen smiled back. “Well, I was, but as you’re up we can eat it here, or on the terrace?”

“On the terrace would be great.” Jared nodded.

They settled down at the table in the bright morning sunshine. Jensen poured out the coffee as Jared spread peanut butter on a slice of toast.

“Sorry it’s just toast, I wasn’t expecting company,” Jensen said.

“It’s fine, it’s what I have most mornings.” Jared took a slurp of coffee.

“I owe you an explanation,” Jensen said, holding his own coffee cup in his hands.

“You don’t need to explain anything to me,” Jared replied, loving how green Jensen’s eyes were when he was serious. “After that Misha guy, you’re bound to have some issues.”

“Yeah, I haven’t been with anyone since him,” Jensen sighed. “I’ve found it hard to trust, to let myself get close to anyone. I guess he really did a number on me. I thought I knew him, I thought we’d be together for life.”

“I know what happened from the news, but do you want to tell me the story?” Jared asked.

“There’s not much to add.” Jensen shrugged. “We met at college, he became my boyfriend, then my manager. When the band was signed to the record label, they said we needed an experienced manager, but I kept Misha on as my personal assistant. It meant we could be together, travel the world, see the sights when we had the chance.”

“Misha didn’t want a career of his own?”

“No, he said he didn’t. He was going to be an accountant, but that wasn’t what he wanted; it was his family business and they expected him to join.”

“So, he used you as a means to escape his family, then blamed you for ruining his career.”

“Exactly. Within a week of him telling me he’d found someone else and was leaving me, I found out he was suing me for loss of earnings and half the house we shared.”

“What a bastard.”

“And then I found out that his hot shot lawyer was also the guy he’d left me for.”

“Damn, I remember reading all about this in the papers,” Jared reached out to take Jensen’s free hand. “It must have been awful.”

“It was like a rug being pulled from beneath my feet. Everything felt wrong; I’d lost my home and my partner. And he knew how ill my mom was; it was just three months later that she died. It was all a fucking train wreck.”

“I can’t believe what he did to you, Jensen.” Jared squeezed his hand. “And I hope you’ll be able to trust me, in time.”

“You mean you want to stick around, even after my freak out?”

“Of course I do.” Jared sighed, “Look, Jensen, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to have sex with you, you’re fucking gorgeous and this feels so right, but there’s more to any relationship than sex, and falling asleep with you in my arms was one of the best experiences of my life.”

“Mine, too.” Jensen smiled at him. “I’d love to do it again.”

“That’s good, because I really want to.”

 

It had been a truly horrific shift, with a multiple car pileup leaving three dead and several with severe injuries. Jared had been part of a team trying to save the life of a twelve-year-old girl who had been a passenger in one of the cars. They had lost her, and the grief-stricken howls from her parents, who had survived with minor injuries, would haunt Jared forever. As he walked back to the locker room to change, he saw a woman staring in horror and realized his scrubs were covered in blood. He’d been so caught up in the futile attempt to save the girl and then so exhausted he hadn’t thought about his appearance.

He showered for a long time when he got home, as if the blood was on his skin, not on the scrubs he’d peeled off back at the hospital. He climbed into bed, exhausted but too wired to sleep, and turned on the radio. It would soon be time for Jack’s show. It had only been two days since they had been together, but Jared missed him. Their work schedules meant they wouldn’t be able to meet up for two more days, which sucked, although they had been texting whenever they could.

“Hey there, night owls,” Jensen’s voice started the show in his usual manner. “Gonna kick off this show with a personal choice, and it’s for Jared, and he’ll know why...well, I hope he will,” Jensen chuckled softly. Jared sat up straight, turning up the volume, heedless of disturbing Matt and Rich.

When the familiar gravelly voice of Paul Rodgers started to rasp out “Ready for Love” Jared actually squealed. Not that he would admit that, of course. The meanings were many – Jensen was ready to trust him, ready to let himself be loved and to love, ready to make love...

Because that’s what it would be. Not just sex. Making love. It’s too soon, his head stated, while his heart contended it’s never too soon.

Jared fired a text off to Jensen, although he knew he didn’t have his cell nearby when he was on air.

“I know why! And I feel the same!”

“Okay, here’s another Bad Company classic, I love...Paul Rodgers voice,” Jensen said, and Jared wasn’t sure if he’d imagined the slight pause after love.

This time it was “Feel Like Making Love” and Jared fell back on his bed, hugging his pillow as he grinned wide enough to split his face. He was about to move a hand down to his hardening dick when Matt and Rich burst through his door.

“Holy fuck, Padalucky,” Rich yelled.

“Wow, Jared, he’s saying he loves you!” Matt also yelled.

“Please, do come in, guys,” Jared grumbled, but couldn’t stop smiling.

“Sorry, but we were listening...” Matt shrugged.

“And we heard you shrieking like a little girl,” Rich added.

“I did not. I just expressed my happiness.” Jared rolled his eyes. “Grab some beers, let’s all listen to the rest of the show.” Jared smiled at his friends.

Jared found himself squashed between Matt and Rich to listen to the show. Part of him wanted to listen alone, and part of him needed to not be alone right now. They’d brought beers, potato chips and popcorn with them.

When Jensen played “Whole Lotta Love” Rich laughed and said “So, he’s seen the Padapackage, then?” and Jared threw a handful of popcorn at him.

 

Jared managed to get a few hours’ sleep, and thankfully this shift was a lot easier. He was about to take a lunch break when he heard a commotion in reception.

It was Jensen.

Jensen-fucking-Ackles had strode into his hospital and didn’t care who saw him. In fact, he was surrounded by a gaggle of nurses and doctors, and smiling politely at them, but his face lit up in a huge smile when he saw Jared.

“Jensen, what are you doing here?” Jared grinned back.

“I couldn’t sleep, and I phoned to ask when your break would be...”

“He spoke to me!” Marcie, one of the interns, squealed.

“It’s so good to see you, shall we go somewhere more private?” Jensen suggested.

“That’s a good idea. There’s a burger joint across the way, does great fries and shakes.”

“You had me at burger.”

“You had me the moment I saw you in M.A.C.K.,” Jared replied, blushing.

“Stalker.”

“Guilty.”

They couldn’t stop smiling at each other and giggling over the silliest things as they ate their lunch, and Jensen didn’t care that people were staring at them. He even signed some autographs and let a couple of fans take selfies. Jared felt a huge bubble of happiness inside him. He’d done this, he’d helped to release Jensen from his self-imposed exile. But even better than that, Jensen loved him.

And he loved Jensen.


	6. Ready For Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared and Jensen plan to go out for a meal, but end up staying in, as Jensen is ready for love, now.

 

The next evening, they had arranged to meet at Jared’s before going out to the local Chinese restaurant. While Jared put his boots on, Jensen ran his finger along the CD shelf and pulled out a familiar one.

“You got the limited edition with the gold disc?” he smiled, holding it up. “You really are a fan!”

“Yeah, I was, and I still am. You have an amazing voice, Jensen,” Jared replied. “I love your cover version of Tennessee Whisky. It’s so sad that you don’t sing anymore.”  


Jensen frowned. “Well, you might get a private performance, but I’m never singing in public again.”

“A private performance would be awesome,” Jared winked, “but never say never, Jensen.” Jared took the CD from his hand and placed it on the shelf. He took both of Jensen’s hands in his own and Jensen shivered. Jared was so much bigger than him – his hands were huge – and Jensen kinda loved it. “I never thought I’d meet Jack, or that he’d turn out to be you, or that I’d be here, with you.”

“And I never thought I’d find...” Jensen hesitated, scared that he was being too forward, but the light shining from Jared’s kaleidoscopic eyes gave him courage. It was the light of love and Jensen knew he was being a hopeless romantic but didn’t care. “I never thought I’d find love again.”

Jared released his hands and pulled him into a kiss, his arms wrapped around Jensen’s back and shoulders. Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared’s waist and kissed him back, tenderly at first, then more passionately as their bodies moved closer together, and all that was separating them was a few layers of clothing.

“I’ve never wanted anyone more than you,” Jared whispered, as they parted to look at each other.

“I feel the same, and I want you, now,” Jensen replied, knowing that this time there would be no freaking out, because he had nothing to worry about. He loved Jared, and it didn’t matter that they’d only known each other a few days. Jared made him feel confident again; he knew he would be able to take on the world with Jared at his side.

“Now...but what about dinner?” Jared raised an eyebrow.

Jensen laughed. “How hungry are you?”

“I can wait – we can get a delivery...later.” Jared grinned.

“I like the way you think,” Jensen replied.

“Then you’ll like what I’m thinking of doing to you...” Jared reached out and looped his long finger through Jensen’s belt, tugging him out of the room, along the corridor and into his bedroom.

“I hope they’re all naughty thoughts,” Jensen chuckled.

Jared lifted him, fucking lifted him, and threw him onto the bed.

“Holy shit!” Jensen yelled, surprised.

“Fuck, sorry, dunno what came over me...” Jared apologized.

“No, it’s okay, better’n okay, I like it,” Jensen admitted, trying not to blush. He loved being manhandled, and Jared was much stronger than Misha, which was very promising. “Hope your bed’s not gonna break.”

“It’s custom made, my one big indulgence.” Jared kneeled between Jensen’s legs and started to undo Jensen’s belt. “For my size...” he winked.

“Just as well,” Jensen laughed. “Do you want me to...?” he gestured at his clothes.

“I’d like to undress you, if that’s alright?” Jared asked.

“Oh yes!” Jensen’s dick twitched, and his hips jerked at the thought.

Jared smirked at him, and undressed him slowly, taking time to stroke or kiss each new inch of skin he unveiled. Jensen was already hard and leaking pre-come when Jared pulled his jeans off and nuzzled at his dick through his boxers.

“Take ‘em off, please,” Jensen begged.

Jared laughed and slowly pushed them down, his eyes widening as Jensen’s dick sprang free.

“Holy fuck, Jensen, you’re so beautiful.” Jared bent down to kiss Jensen’s dick, then licked it all over, making Jensen squirm and curse.

“Oh fuck, oh shit, oh fuckity-fuck...” Jensen was losing the ability to be coherent in any shape or form. Christ, it had been so long since anyone had touched him like this, and Jared was so gentle, so strong, so fucking perfect.

“Fuckity-fuck?” Jared laughed.

“Stop laughing an’ keep licking,” Jensen grumbled.

“I’m gonna do more than that,” Jared replied.

Jensen leaned back onto the pillows as Jared’s mouth started to enclose his dick; he closed his eyes, his hands gripping Jared’s hair. He wanted this so much, and knew he wasn’t going to last long. Jared’s mouth moved up and down Jensen’s length, sucking him down, until Jensen couldn’t hold back any longer.

“Jared...fuck...I’m gonna come,” Jensen warned, and Jared just grunted with a nod. Jensen shot his load into the back of Jared’s mouth. Jared gasped and choked a little, but swallowed him down.

Jared sat up, wiping his lips and grinning broadly. “Fuckity-fuck!”

Jensen was too fucked-out to laugh, but managed a smile. Jared leaned down to kiss him, once, on the lips then whispered in his ear. “Gonna make you come again, Jensen, when I’m inside you.”

“Oooh fuuuck,” Jensen moaned.

Jared stripped off quickly, and soon had his long, nimble fingers inside Jensen, stretching him out slowly. “Next time I’ll take it slower, I wanna taste you, Jensen, all of you, but I can’t wait much longer...” Jared said as he added a third finger and slowly moved them inside Jensen.

“You’re killing me, fuck, need you...” Jensen’s dick was already starting to harden again. The combination of Jared’s fingers inside him and what he was saying was too much. Fuck, he wasn’t gonna cry, he wasn’t...

“Shit, Jensen, you okay?” Jared pulled his fingers out slowly, his face showing his concern. “I haven’t hurt you, have I?”

“No, no, it’s just so...intense...good intense...” Jensen gave a shaky laugh. “Sorry, I’m not making much sense. I just love you inside me, Jared, and I need...I need...”

“It’s okay,” Jared smiled at him and Jensen knew right then that he wanted to see that smile every day for the rest of his life. “I’m gonna make you feel so good, Jensen. I’m gonna take care of you.”

Jared used his clean hand to wipe away Jensen’s tears, but Jared’s tenderness just made Jensen cry more. He knew this wasn’t just sex, this was making love.

“S-sorry,” Jensen sobbed, “I’m okay, really, just...please...” His hips bucked as if proving how okay he really was, and Jared laughed.

“Okay, if you’re sure.” Jared lined his big, beautiful dick up at Jensen’s hole and pushed inside.

 

Later, after they’d ordered in their food, Jared handed Rich’s guitar to Jensen. “Hey, you promised you’d play for me.”

Jensen smiled as he started to tune it. “Boy, this is so outta tune, I could be here all night.”

“I don’t see a problem there,” Jared laughed.

“You won’t be the one with sore fingers,” Jensen grumbled, but felt himself blushing.

“I can kiss them better for you,” Jared winked.

“I’ll keep you to that promise,” Jensen smiled. “Okay, that’ll have to do for now. This isn’t one of my own songs, but it really sums up how you make me feel...

'And I'd give up forever to touch you,  
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow...'"

Jared listened intently, and Jensen got lost in the beauty of the lyrics. When he got to the refrain -

'And I don't want the world to see me....  
...I just want you to know who I am.'

\- he saw Jared’s eyes fill with tears. Jensen put the guitar down, so that he could pull Jared into his arms. “Hey, darlin’, it’s okay.”

“I’m just so sorry you’ve been through so much shit, Jensen,” Jared sobbed against Jensen’s shoulder. “And I’m so pleased I’m the one you trust.”

“Me, too.” Jensen kissed him, then hugged him until the doorbell rang. Jensen got up to open the door for their food delivery, while Jared got some beers from the fridge. They sat on the sofa side by side as they ate their meal, with Die Hard on in the background, chatting about music and movies.

Just as they were finishing their meal, Matt and Rich came home. They eyed the food - and the fact that both Jensen and Jared were bare footed - and grinned.

“You didn’t make it to the restaurant then, Padahorny?” Rich teased.

“Lucky we were out,” Matt joined in. “You know how thin these walls are.”

“Jensen, these two morons are Matt and Rich, as you probably guessed,” Jared sighed.

“Oh yes, they live up to your description,” Jensen smiled at them.

“I bet he said only good things.” Matt winked. “We’re just a bit star-struck, it’s not every day we get to meet a famous rock star,”

“You don’t need to be, I’m just a regular guy,”

“Huh, no you’re not, Ackles, you’re even more gorgeous in real life,” Rich stared openly at Jensen.

“Hey, that’s my boyfriend you’re ogling, pervert,” Jared complained.

“And your own boyfriend is right here!” Matt punched Rich in the arm.

“Ow!” Rich exclaimed.

“Just try to ignore them,” Jared grumbled.

“Hey, Jensen, did Jared show you the poster he has of you?” Rich grinned. “It’s hanging inside his closet, next to his lube...”

 

 

Jared picked up a throw pillow and launched it at Rich, who ducked so it hit Matt in the face. Matt shoved Rich and they jostled each other as they left the room to get some beers.

Jensen watched them leave, and smiled. He could imagine them meeting up with his friends and knew they would all hit it off immediately. Life with Jared was going to be so good.  


“Penny for them?” Jared leaned closer to whisper.

“I’m thinking about how well our friends are gonna get along, and more importantly, how happy you’ve made me, Jared.” Jensen leaned against his shoulder. “Thank you for phoning your request in and changing my life.”

“Thank you for changing my life, too, Jack.” Jared kissed him.

“I think I prefer Jensen, now.”

 

 


End file.
